How many times, have I NOT been here before...the same thing, "you're lesions are acting up and are now active." It's been 6 years that I have been hearing those words time and time again...I already knew, I was already dropping some of my medications and letting go of prozac seemed to me to have solved the problem. But that wasn't what was wrong this time...
Every time this happens I think about my months before leaving for Afghanistan, when the army had finally believed that something was wrong with me and had approved me for an MRI. Back to that day, when 1ST had a talk with me about NOT taking that MRI, because IF they found something, I would no long be deploy-able, and I was needed he said. Needed for what 1SG, to have someone to keep you distracted while we were out there??? I'm sorry I didn't place my bigger boobs on your desk like Courtney use to (I would have won if I had, because mine are way bigger) but I suppose I was needed out there for the drama that always followed me thanks to Hos. Courtney, when will you tell Flaherty that whatever happened that day that she was mad at me for losing my mask wasn't even my fault, because the last thing I had said that day, was "while yes I made have given it to SSG Flaherty, let me go check, since no one had told me we were suppose to turn them back in" but SSG was so mad, I always thought they she had gotten yelled at for my mistake too and I remember that before we took off, 1SG would bring Courtney and I in to ask about who was giving up problems so he could find a reason for him to yell at them for and I figure, that day, Flaherty had been on the shit list. But anyways, enough of that, while I found a way to look beyond the bombs and the Taliban, I actually found myself out there and actually had a good time looking up at the stars. I've always wondered though, how much longer would I have to live had I stayed in Germany and started treating my MS 1 year sooner???
Call me superstitious (I am Mexican you know), but I've known since the age 8 that something was not right with me. I started asking for back massages since that age, because even then, my back would always hurt so bad...BUT we always blamed it on getting hit by a car at age 6. Thing is, I always knew it was worse, had always prepared myself for that day when I stood in the doctors office and got the bad news, I just always thought it would be cancer and that I would get a time frame, never this, never MS. "Don't worry, you're going to be okay," that was the last thing you told me Chong, that night that I left Afghanistan, and the first time, I realized that day for the bad news was only hours away. I have never forgotten those words Chong, so I want to thank you for having told me that, because those words are still my mantra...things are ok, I will be okay. I WILL BE OKAY!
God Bless,
Michelle
Every time this happens I think about my months before leaving for Afghanistan, when the army had finally believed that something was wrong with me and had approved me for an MRI. Back to that day, when 1ST had a talk with me about NOT taking that MRI, because IF they found something, I would no long be deploy-able, and I was needed he said. Needed for what 1SG, to have someone to keep you distracted while we were out there??? I'm sorry I didn't place my bigger boobs on your desk like Courtney use to (I would have won if I had, because mine are way bigger) but I suppose I was needed out there for the drama that always followed me thanks to Hos. Courtney, when will you tell Flaherty that whatever happened that day that she was mad at me for losing my mask wasn't even my fault, because the last thing I had said that day, was "while yes I made have given it to SSG Flaherty, let me go check, since no one had told me we were suppose to turn them back in" but SSG was so mad, I always thought they she had gotten yelled at for my mistake too and I remember that before we took off, 1SG would bring Courtney and I in to ask about who was giving up problems so he could find a reason for him to yell at them for and I figure, that day, Flaherty had been on the shit list. But anyways, enough of that, while I found a way to look beyond the bombs and the Taliban, I actually found myself out there and actually had a good time looking up at the stars. I've always wondered though, how much longer would I have to live had I stayed in Germany and started treating my MS 1 year sooner???
Call me superstitious (I am Mexican you know), but I've known since the age 8 that something was not right with me. I started asking for back massages since that age, because even then, my back would always hurt so bad...BUT we always blamed it on getting hit by a car at age 6. Thing is, I always knew it was worse, had always prepared myself for that day when I stood in the doctors office and got the bad news, I just always thought it would be cancer and that I would get a time frame, never this, never MS. "Don't worry, you're going to be okay," that was the last thing you told me Chong, that night that I left Afghanistan, and the first time, I realized that day for the bad news was only hours away. I have never forgotten those words Chong, so I want to thank you for having told me that, because those words are still my mantra...things are ok, I will be okay. I WILL BE OKAY!
God Bless,
Michelle
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