Thanks???giving

For the last 6 years, I have said thank you for having come down with MS, but this year, this year I'm not quite sure...Did MS save me from a worse life?  The wrong path?  Should I be thankful to be retired at 29 and not have the strength to even walk my dog?

I prepared for 4 years from now!  I was going to save the weak, inspire the fearful, help everyone find the thing that they are good at, but why can't I inspire myself?  Motivate myself?  Do I truly believe all of the negative words I heard growing up?  I always told myself that I didn't need anyone, that I was confident enough to rely on myself, but I lied, I'm really not!  So what do I do now?  What do I do now that one part of my body after another just gives up?  I know I have an amazing husband, AMAZING, but I don't want to put him through the hell tat I know I am, so where do I turn and whom do I turn to???